Over the years, I’ve read quite a few articles about what men and women from Craigslist are looking for in the opposite sex. Many factors are mentioned, among them good looks, honesty, and the ability to make more than minimum wage. So many times, though, it appears to boil down to one thing for each sex. Men are looking for a woman from Craigslist who is confident. Women are looking for a from Craigslist man who will make them laugh.
Today I was looking into the book, “Make Every Man Want You (or Make Yours Want You More): How To Be So Damn Irresistible You’ll Barely Keep From Dating Yourself!” by Marie Forleo. I recently read an excerpt from the book in an article on Craigslist (Unattractive Women Habits ). The article explained the ways in which women act unattractively; being needy, down-playing their looks, worrying about what they aren’t rather than what they are, etc. When we do this, when we question our worth, looks, whatever - we are dimming our own light. This supports my theory about men looking for a woman who is confident.
Some insights from the book include:
“Know this, your irresistibility is greatest when you are present, and free from mental chatter. That’s because the fullness and glory of your being is showing through… It is timeless and beautiful….It needs nothing and seeks no approval…”
“The mind is not usually supportive of your irresistibility. It likes to talk about your mistakes…”
It’s about understanding your reality, embracing it, and moving on. To be successfully irresistible, you need to be in touch with the “is-ness,” of you - accept what is, don’t worry about what is not. This makes perfect sense to me. When my boyfriend and I fell in love last Summer, I was feeling in harmony with my life. It wasn’t perfect, but I focused on three things to make it feel like it was; perspective, flexibility, and grace. If I was upset about something, felt stuck in some way, I did my best to be flexible, to wiggle it around until it felt comfortable - I changed my perspective. I accepted that yes, this is my lot in life and I would go about each day with as much grace as possible. For example, no I did not have bags of money, but I was free to go hang out at the creek, floating on my raft for an hour, enjoying the sounds of the birds and feeling the sun on my face, if I wanted to. Acceptance of your is-ness, it’s powerful.
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Older, Wiser, and Available
I came across an article on Craigslist that talks about the middle-age dating scene and how it is not for the weak of heart.
It offered a glimpse on how middle-aged individuals carry find dating in this day and age. If you would think about it, it can be a bit difficult to deal with. Putting themselves out there, somewhat in competition with the younger generation, carrying with them baggages, i.e. kids, family, career status, aged looks, etc., can be a little intimidating.
You don’t really have to take these baggages negatively. Look at it as building blocks to your uniqueness and character. These are part of who you are and you’re beautiful that way.
Personally, I applaud these individuals for their courage and boldness. Not only do I find them beautiful beings because, having gone through life and loss, they would still find the strength and time to seek out or allow themselves to become available to others who are seeking partners in life. I’d like to think that they’ve got a lot more to offer to a smart individual. What they offer is a relationship that surpasses the trivialities of fancy youth and agility that the younger generation seem to bank on. With them comes depth of character and steady foundations for a life, real life.
What do you guys think? Do you know of anyone who are older, wiser, and available but is hesitant to put himself or herself out there? Let them know that it’s alright. Give them some pep talk!
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